The Joy Dare!

At the end of last week a package arrived in the mail. It was a package that I had been waiting and hoping for. Hoping it would arrive soon.
With anticipation I opened it. The brown paper crinkly beneath my hands. There it was, a new book that I knew somehow would change my world a little at a time. A world that had become blah and grey and thankless.
And so I began my journey into this new world created by words on a page...
Do you wonder what book this is?

One Thousand Gifts:
A Dare to Live Fully
Right Where You Are
aholyexperience.com

After reading a few chapters I was once again surprised. Surprised that Father knew exactly what I needed. The perspective that I needed for someone else to shine into my little corner.

If you knew me you would know that I don't read books because they are the newest Christian fad or on the recommendation of a church or facebook page. This book has been on my heart and I knew somehow that it was a book He was giving me to read...

Ann Voskamp writes beautifully. She writes in such a way that all those thoughts in my mind that I can't quite find the words for..she somehow finds those words and captures them; pen to paper.
Many questions I wonder myself...no answers...but I am learning and growing...I am.

On Ann Voskamp's web site she is doing a Joy Dare and I have decided as a way to increase my blogging and because I NEED to do this..NEED to have thankfulness in my life to be a part of it.
I am a little behind so today's blog I will have to catch up.

January's Joy Dare
1. 3 things about yourself you are grateful for
    a. breasts to feed and nurture my babies
    b. my ability to forgive quickly
    c. I love deeply

2. a gift outside, inside, on a plate
    a. Sunshine!!
    b. Books
    c. the supper my dh made

3. 3 lines you overheard that were graces
    a. I bet you are so excited for that next one!
    b. Have I told you lately how much I love you?
    c. Well, he's not old, not really...

4. one gift old, new, & blue
    a. my grandpa; 87 yrs when he passed
    b. His mercies every morning
    c. a large book for large families

5. something you're reading, you're making, you're seeing
    a. One Thousand Gifts
    b. Love
    c. thankfulness is a verb

6. one thing in your bag, your fridge, your heart
    a. lavender lotion
    b. half & half; my tea is not tea without it
    c. fear

7. 3 graces from people you love
    a. my 15 yr. old son telling me he loves me
    b. supper served up warm
    c. His love letter to me

8. light that caught you, a reflection that surprised you, a shadow that fell lovely
    a. morning light flowing in through my bedroom window; so inviting and happy
    b. my face in the mirror with hair undone, expecting plain but seeing beauty
    c. plant hanging in my dining room and it's shadow on the wall, perfectly designed

All caught up! Tomorrow is Day 9!
      

A New Calendar Year

This past year has been a hard one.  We moved to a new state: Texas. My sweet husband started a new job and then another one. I became an active LLL leader again. We have met new people and made new friends. 


My grandmother and grandfather passed away within 2 months of each other. I miss them. A few weeks ago while shopping at Sam's Club I saw an elderly gentleman and his mannerisms were so much like my grandpa. My heart was hurting as I remembered...
You never think of life without them. You picture your future with them in it. It's a sad photo when their images are removed. 


And spiritually there have been hard challenges also. Changes in my heart and my spirit. There are alot I am not happy with but yet some...


So as I start this new year there are a few areas I want to focus..
And so Father asks the questions....
If you don't get ____________


..If I say no will you still love me? Will you still serve me and give me your life? If you don't get ...
a new job..
resolved relationships
more money
another baby 
friendships
a new home
less trials
and the on the list goes..

 I also want to learn to recognize Father's voice. He tells us in His word that His sheep know His voice.


So often I falter..I am not sure? Is it me or is it the Holy Spirit? Am I supposed to speak to that woman and tell her or is it just me? When I pray is the answer from you Father or is it from me? 


I need clear direction and knowing His voice I believe to be the first and most important step.


There are many unresolved issues I have in regards to scripture and what's truth and what's not. So much I don't understand..so many voices telling me that this and that are truth. I need only to know what He says. (see how recognizing His voice comes into play in every area?) 


What's your focus this next calendar year?
 

Journal..

In my life this week… I have been working on getting back into my daily schedule. Finding my groove again. I have had a few wonderful things happen this week; I am an active LLL Leader again and the parenting naturally moms night out last night.  

In our homeschool this week…We have done pretty well getting everything accomplished. Today the kiddos are having coffee time just like they do in South America. It's a Colombian recipe. It has Hershey's chocolate syrup in it. Yum!  

Helpful homeschooling tips or advice to share…When LIFE interrupts your routine go easy on yourself. Give yourself time to get back into the swing of things. And take a deep breath! 

I am inspired by… my children and how they see life. They so easily find joy in the mundane things of life. I think we could all learn important lessons from the children in our lives.  

Places we’re going and people we’re seeing… We see other homeschooler's because of the clubs we are a part of. This week the girl's had their pinning ceremony for the pins they have earned so far. My two youngest girls were so excited and proud of themselves for the pins they earned. 

My favorite thing so far this week is…Becoming an active LLL Leader again and all that entails! Exciting opportunities ahead! 

Questions/thoughts I have… Trying harder to be in the Word everyday and to keep up better with my bible study.

 ³¹ So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed Him, "If you continue in My word, ^[a] you really are My disciples.³² You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." ~ John 8:31-32

   Things I’m working on…my eating..I have not been diligent at keeping my body healthy by eating right. I was doing so well and then I had to go out of state. The last 9 months since moving to Amarillo have really thrown me off in this area. I need to put more effort into eating right and exercising. 

I’m reading…this and that

I’m cooking…lunch here shortly. Thinking of making a quick chicken soup. 

I’m grateful for…fresh fruit juice.

I’m praying for… disappointments, my attitudes, others in my life, etc..

My Grandpa...

Today was my grandpa's funeral. It was a sad day but also a day to remember.

I have so many memories of my grandfather and so many ways he shaped my life. He was a wonderful man. !!

I remember as a very young girl getting my very first bike from my grandpa. And I remember that he put me on it and taught me how to ride it. I fell quite a few times but finally I realized I needed to pedal and pedal fast. It was a blue bike and I loved it! It was mine and I was a big girl!

I remember my grandpa always carried butterscotch candy in his front shirt pocket and handed them out to all of his grandchildren.

He was always there for me when I had car trouble. He taught me those first important things about vehicles that you need to know.

I remember he loved to watch wrestling and while my grandma would watch her shows upstairs he would go downstairs and watch wrestling. Sometimes I would watch it with him just so I could be with him.

I remember he always opened the car door for my grandma. This always was what a gentlemen was to me and still is.

He was gentle.

He was kind and loving. As a little thing I loved to sit on my grandpas lap and snuggle.

He was handsome.

He always had time for me. I never felt like I was an intrusion or that he had something more important to do.

He was a special person and a great man. There will remain an empty place in my life without him.

ZaraLayna is 6!!!!!

Today 6 years ago my sweet baby girl ZaraLayna was born!! She was a much anticipated baby girl! We were gifted with her from Father! We had lost our dd RuthAnne in 2002 and had been in prayer for another daughter. ZaraLayna was the answer to that prayer!!

Her birth story below:

Wed Oct 05, 2005

She is finally here!! My birth story!!

Early morning on October 4th I was attempting to sleep out on the couch but my teeth were feeling a little sensitive and throbbing with each beat of my heart so I decided to get up and rearrange my livingroom. I did a major rearranging. This was at about 1am. I ended it by mopping my kitchen and livingroom floors. I felt satisfied that everything looked spic and span! I went to bed about 3am again on the couch after taking a tylenol for my aching teeth. At 6am I woke up because of two hard ctx. I went potty and kept hoping for more but none came so I figured it was like all the other times I was jolted awake from a hard ctx only to still be pregnant for days after. I decided to go back to bed. I laid down on the couch. At 6:15am I had the first ctx that begin my labor. The first so many were about 10 minutes apart. After that they went to 2 minutes apart. I waited until they had been coming consistantly for about 45 minutes and went in and woke up my dh and told him I was in labor. He just looked at me and said, "Are you serious?" I think he was pretty surprised. It seemed like we had been waiting for so long!
We then decided to get the pool ready because all of my past labors had been so fast we wanted to make sure it was ready. I just continued to walk and pace through them. They were still 2 minutes apart. I had seen a bit of pink and knew I was dilating. At about 8am I felt like they were getting pretty intense so I told John I needed to get in the pool. I got in and they stopped coming every two minutes and went to about 10 minutes apart. I figured they would pick back up so I waited in the pool. They did pick back up to about every 2 or 3 minutes apart but they weren't as intense. I finally decided to get out and go potty and see if that helped. When I got in the pool I felt that I was heading into transition but the water slowed it down. I went potty and while on the toilet I begin to have really intense ctx again. I decided to push lightly with a few to see if it was about that time. I begin to do that and felt that it was. I begin to push. I was pushing as hard as I could and nothing was happening. I began to get very tired and shaky from the pushing. I was in the bathroom squatting on the floor holding onto the sink for leverage. John tried to come in but I wouldn't let him. Finally he pushed the door open and came in. He told me to get back in the pool and se if it helped with the pain and pushing. He helped me to the pool. I got in and the ctx stayed vey intense but I just didn't feel right for some reason in the pool. I couldn't get comfortable. So I told John that I wanted out and wanted to go back into the bathroom and push there. I went into the bathroom and begin to push once again. Again nothing was happening. I asked John to check me and see where baby's head was. He checked me and could feel baby's head in the birth canal but still up a a ways. I begin to push again but I had to stop because I was shaking and weak from pushing so hard and the lack of progress. I decided to go lay down on my son's bed. My friend Robin had shown up during this time and begin to do counter pressure on my back during the ctx. I rested through about 4 of them and then decided I couldn't lay down anymore and needed to push. I leaned against the bed in a squat and pushed some more with again no progress. So I decided that I had to rest. I was so tired and wanted to sleep in between the ctx if I could. I also was feeling sick to my tummy, weak and shaky. Just plain worn out...
I had my dh John and Robin come upstairs with me. We decided to see if we could feel the water bag bulging enough to try to pop the bag and get things moving a bit. John checked me and to my dismay found that the baby's head had went all the way back up. He could barely reach it. He could feel the water bag but it wasn't bulging and there was no way for us to break it.
This begin my 3 hours of transition. I laid on my bed and would doze during the ctx. They were coming every 2 minutes for 3 hours. They were so intense I truly thought I was going to lose my mind. Robin did counter pressure on my back and after awhile John took over and begin to apply the pressure to my back. They pushed so hard my back is very sore and I am sure bruised. I would tell them push harder. I needed them to push hard to help with the intense back pain I was having. It gave me something else to focus on. While John applied the counter pressure Robin kept her hands on my belly feeling baby's position and if she was moving down. She felt the baby and discovered that she was posterior. At the end of this 3 hours I felt ZaraLayna being pushed down. I didn't feel pushy but I knew that she was being pushed into the birth canal and that the ctx were so intense that I had to push and get this done before I went crazy with the pain. So I got off the bed and squatted against it and begin to push. I probably pushed for about 10 minutes or so. When I begin to push lots of fluid begin to come out. And then right before her head came I felt a little pop of the rest of water bag that wasn't broken. Her head followed after that. Once I got her head out I then gave one last push and out came her body! The pushing hurt very bad. I felt like I was being torn apart. John grabbed her from behind me and Robin and John checked her over. After they had looked at her and saw she was breathing, etc.. they begin to see to me. I hadn't even looked at her yet because as soon as she was out I couldn't move. The pain in my bottom area was so awful that all I could do was stay in the sqauttiing position. Finally Robin helped me sit down against her. That helped with the pain. I begin to cry because I was in such intense pain. And then when I saw her I kept crying. She was here and she was so beautiful! I sat on the floor for quite awhile as we waited for the cord to stop pulsing and turn white. Then John cut and clamped the cord. ZaraLayna pinked up right away. When she was born her color was really good. She also cried as soon as she entered our world.
Eventually I was up and in the shower.
We are enjoying her so much. Although it was my hardest labor she was worth it! It was 6 1/2 hours long but being in transition for 3 hours and having her go all the way back up seemingly going backwards in my progress made it a very intense and painful labor. We did it! I did it without any intervention or pain meds. Now I know that even when its rough and things are discouraging I can do it at home. I love birthing unassisted! All the glory be given to God for our precious baby girl ZaraLayna!

She weighed in at 7lbs. 12-14 oz. She wiggled a bit on our scale so we weren't sure if it was 12 or 14 oz but somewhere in there. And she is 19 inches long. She has black hair and a great color to her. :) She is beautiful. She is a very pretty baby girl! :)
Thank HaShem for my 2nd VBAC and 4th UC!



Happy Birthday ZaraLayna!!!

The Fair

Last week was fair week here in our area of Texas. My oldest dd Morgan-Britney sat at the Pro Life booth on Thursday so while she did that I used that time to take my other children to see the animals. We saw some neat ones. They had a petting zoo and HUGE tigers. The Siberian Tiger just made me shiver imagining being his lunch!! EEK!!
I got some great pics to share with you...

It was a very enjoyable day! 

Toilet Signs

Life has gotten so busy! I am going to try to be more diligent in keeping up with my blogging.

I always find it so interesting and sometimes comical the things we mama's spend our time focusing on. This morning I have spent my time searching Google for visual reminders to put in our bathroom. Things such as "wash your hands" & "flush the toilet". I have high hopes that these may indeed help remind my children what proper bathroom etiquette is.

The last thing I need to search for is a set of instructions on what to do when there is tinkling left behind. Those sprinkles left from the boy's tinkles usually end up on mama. You would think by now and with 7 boys I would remember to wipe the seat or at the very least look before sitting down but, alas, I don't! I plop right down and experience that unpleasant wetness and then the word "yuck" slips right out of my mouth followed by a not so lady like call/shout; BOYS!!!

I have my hopes set highly upon the "If you sprinkle when you tinkle be a sweety wipe the seaty" sign. Those mama's with boys are sympathizing with me right now...

Well, I am off to get these signs up...

I think I'll pray over them too!!

Taking a trip to WY!

My grandparents aren't doing so well health wise so my children and I will be headed to WY sometime next week. My sweet man can't come as he has no vacation yet since his job is so new. I will miss him. I have never driven anywhere this far away by myself with the kiddos so I am a tad nervous.

I have alot to get done and alot to get ready before we leave. Today our first step towards leaving is getting all our laundry caught up.. (In our home getting the laundry caught up rarely ever happens. The minute it's all washed there is dirty laundry already pouring into the hamper!)  I need to plan some meals for my love so while I am gone he can have simple meals to cook/eat. My dh is an excellent cook so I know he won't mind having to make some of his meals but I want to have the ingredients all planned out and some easy meals for him. Oh, dear, I am going to miss him so!! He is the man of my dreams and I hate being away from him for too long!

I need to get busy on a list of what we need and get some grocery shopping done and the cooler ready for our trip!

It's an 11hr. drive but with nursing babies and potty breaks etc.. It will take us longer. I am going to try to make it in one day but if we can't then we just can't and will get a motel room for the night and start bright and early the next morning!

We'll bring along some books on tape and music to keep our minds busy as we drive..

I am looking forward to seeing my family. :) I miss them!

Please just keep us in your prayers for travel mercies and that I get everything done I need too. Thanks!