Boundaries

I guess I have been lapse in setting boundaries. Today I realized that I must set boundaries. I must. I try so hard to exercise graciousness with others that my personal limits get overstepped frequently and then with that the peace that is hard won takes its leave.

Wise words today from a sister in Father helped me realize that my direction doesn't change based on anything said or done. Father leads my dh and I in His ways. He speaks to us as to what we are to do, the road we're to walk, etc.. And what happens in our lives is based on the conviction that Father has given us.

I guess the world at large just isn't sure how to take a woman who greatly desires another child..who hurts when her womb is emptied of life...I am an oddity. There are those of us out there that are oddities..

I keep thinking of the song God's Own Fool by Michael Card. I am God's fool. I desire babies rightly, as scripture tells us that is a good thing. I know I please my Heavenly Father when I place my trust in Him and His purposes and plans.

Something I have been thinking on; walking a road where Father is given freedom to work in my body and life is not an easy road. It's a constant road where I daily have to choose to trust, and to not be afraid, to cling to Him when I am. Controlling it would be so much easier. Nothing left to chance...everything in control..
For me, it's a faith walk everyday. I like to be in control. I do as most of us do. I would like life to be laid out neatly and in order. I like things to be neat and organized. But life is messy. Nothing is certain. All I can count on is my Father in whom I put my faith and hope.

I am weak. Show me someone that isn't..I am hurting. I lose hope. My trust falters. But I know who to turn to. I know who holds my future. I don't have to be strong and never falter. Father knows my pain and my hurts. I am so glad that He allows me to be weak, to hurt, hopeless and to falter...Scripture tells us he gives strength to the weak and upholds those who falter.
He carries us when we can no longer carry ourselves. I have nothing to show Him. He knows all. He sees all.

Thank You Father! I love you...help me to love you more..