Wombmama's UnaBirth Blog

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Wombmama's UnaBirth Blog

Lessons & Thankfulness

Life is moving on and I am learning to see the blessings and things Father is teaching me through the struggles. I am learning to be thankful. To find joy in small things...

The way my 6 & 8 yr. old listen attentively with wide open eyes as I read from Story of the World.

Discussions about Leif Ericson and his many voyages and explorations in North America, Greenland, etc..with my 15 & 16 yr. old.

The sweet smiling face of my 4 yr. old as he plays with his new creation he created during OT.

My baby boy and sweet chubby self! How he says words and kisses & cuddles..

Our first homeschooling day for the yr. that pretty well considering the size of our family and the many things we have to cover!

My love who is working very hard on getting our chicken coops ready for chicks!

My 16 yr. son who still tells me he loves me all the time..

My 20 yr. dd who has exceeded all my expectations and is a beautiful young lady, inside & out!

My 13 yr. old who cooks such tasty meals and LOVES to be in the kitchen!

My 10 yr. old who really enjoys cleaning the kitchen, dishes and all! Yay for that!!!! All mamas need a child like that!! :)

Packages in the mail for my growing belly!

Finding a new church where the Pastor is so happy and full of life and is even trying to memorize all 10 of my children's names after only 2 visits!!

Feeling so inadequate and like the awful things said and done to me are really who I am until I look into the eyes of my sweet love and I see my beauty and know those were just the enemy and that I am not who they say I am. When I read sweet encouraging words from a friend reminding me of who I am in Christ and anything others say doesn't matter! My children and how they see me...maybe I can believe I am not words and actions...I can brush them away...  

Scripture that reminds me that we fight not against flesh & blood but against principalities and powers..reminding me that the enemy is at work!

My baby belly that's growing..the weight I am gaining all for my baby bean...the new life we have been given!

Feeling little bean move even as I type this! I feel she/he more everyday!!

Good friends and renewed friendship from state to state!
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The biggest lesson I have learned so far in all of this is how hard it is to be a woman of integrity when others aren't..It's not easy being different! It's not easy living for Elohim and following His word and your convictions when so many don't..
But Father didn't promise us easy! Yeshua told us "Take courage! I have overcome the world!!" and "Lo, I am with you always, even until the end of the age!"

So, I pray give me courage Father! And thank you for your abundant life, your many blessings and trials. Thank you for beauty out of ashes!

Just sharing..

I wanted to share the Weekly Edrash with you as I think it's a good reminder for all of us..

Our obedience to God does not deserve any special accolades. It is what we were created to do. Rabbi Yochanon ben Zachai said, "If you have learned much Torah, do not claim credit for yourself, because for such a purpose you were created." (m.Avot 2:8) Ekev Ekev - עקב : Because" Torah : Deuteronomy 7:21-11:25 Haftarah : Isaiah 49:14-51:3 Gospels : John 13:31-15:27

What We Were Created For Moses warned Israel against thinking that their own righteousness merited their success. "Do not say in your heart when the LORD your God has driven them out before you, 'Because of my righteousness the LORD has brought me in to possess this land...' It is not for your righteousness or for the uprightness of your heart that you are going to possess their land, but...in order to confirm the oath which the LORD swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob." (Deuteronomy 9:4-5) We would do well to take the same warning. Though there are always blessings for obedience and punishments for disobedience, it would be foolish of us to assume that our righteousness amounts to anything. A person busily engaged in keeping the commandments might assume that he is a pretty righteous person and that God owes him some reward. It's a wrong assumption. Rabbi Hillel taught, "Do not believe in yourself until the day you die." (m.Avot 2:4) Moses reminded Israel that if not for his own intercession on their behalf, they would not have survived the trip from Sinai to the Promised Land. Therefore, they should not imagine that their righteousness amounted to anything. In the same way, if we are ever tempted to imagine that our own righteousness has amounted to something, we had best remind ourselves that if not for Yeshua's intercession on our behalf, we would never survive the journey. Even if one's righteousness did accumulate enough to merit a reward, that is God's business, not ours. We are not supposed to keep Torah for the sake of receiving reward. The Master teaches us to obey God simply on the basis that it is what we are supposed to do. We are his servants, and a servant's job is to obey his master. Which of you, having a slave plowing or tending sheep, will say to him when he has come in from the field, "Come immediately and sit down to eat"? But will he not say to him, "Prepare something for me to eat, and properly clothe yourself and serve me while I eat and drink; and afterward you may eat and drink"? He does not thank the slave because he did the things which were commanded, does he? So you too, when you do all the things which are commanded you, say, "We are unworthy slaves; we have done only that which we ought to have done." (Luke 17:7-10)

Waste

Lies and gossip hurt so many people.

Why is it so easy for people to believe the gossip and lies before they give heed to the truth?

Why do some people claim the name of Christ and then gossip and lie? And cause so much hurt?

The last 9 months of my life have been wasted..I have failed...

I am so easily forgotten...  and my work so easily pushed aside by many...

Happy with my decision but hurting by how it all came about...

Sad still by how much hurt is in my heart because of lies and gossip. By someone who shows no regard or remorse for hurts...

I will never understand people..

I love this saying because it's so true!

"Those who matter won't mind, and those who mind don't matter."

I am pushing on...

ya, me too!

Do you ever feel like you fail at everything you do in life? That even when you try to do the right thing it blows up in your face? That you're a failure?

Ya, me too!

Do you ever feel unloved and unworthy of anyone loving you? Do you feel like you can't trust anyone because eventually everyone hurts you? Do you ever feel it's because of who you are and how unlovable you are?

Ya, me too!

You know that even though you're heart was right and your intentions honorable that in the end it will be your fault and you'll be to blame. You feel this way because sadly this is what life has taught you..

Ya, me too!

Do you ever wonder why you even try anymore? Do you remind yourself why you guard your heart and staying at home hiding is so inviting?

Ya, me too!

Do you ever regret letting others see you vunerable? You know your weakness will be laughed at and mocked and used against you.

Ya, me too!

Do you ever wonder why the Father up in heaven would care about someone such as you? How could he?

Ya, me too!

New things..

We're moving and heading to country living! We have been in Texas for 16 months now in a small 3 bdrm home. We decided to start looking for something bigger. 4 days after starting our search we we're moving! Father provided a bigger home out of the city where we can have chickens, turkeys and a dog! All kinds of new things for us!!

Our new home!

 
We also have a new puppy. The children just love her!

They chose the name Socks for her as she looks like she is wearing socks! :)

And Monday I was able to take a peek at our newest blessing all snuggled in my womb...

To follow along with my pregnancy check out my pregnancy blog:
Wombmama

Blessings!!

Live fearlessly!

Last weekend while shopping at the used homeschool curriculum sale I came across a blue book with the title Live Fearlessly. My attention was immediately captured. Coincidence? I think not!
This book is a "study in the book of Joshua" ..
I want, I desire, no I need to learn to live fearlessly and to walk in faith and trust. I don't believe for one second Yeshua Messiah wants us walking through life full of fear, doubt, uncertainty and worry...

Father has been showing me my sin of worry. I worry..I literally make myself sick...I can't live like this..where is my trust and my faith...?

I finished day 2 this morning and already He is teaching me and showing me..
And how awesome is my Lord...even in the midst of my fear, worry and lack of trust He still speaks to me and gives me balm for my weary heart...

My prayer for this week: Messiah Yeshua be VICTORIOUS in my heart and life!

I will end this with a quote from Day 1...

I would say to my soul, O my soul, this is not the place of despair; this is not the time to despair in. As long as mine eyes can find a promise in the Bible......as long as there is a moment left me of breath or life in this world, so long will I wait or look for mercy, so long will I fight against unbelief and despair. ~ John Bunyan      

Twelve Lives

In our lives:

Our school year has ended. My two oldest boys 15 & 16 will continue with Math throughout the summer along with my dd, who is 13. This way they will be caught up once we start again in Aug./Sept.

My two oldest boys are still doing lawn mowing for others in our neighborhood. They have quite a little business going! They work hard and do a great job! My son Josiah who is 16 is really great with people and just has a way about him that draws others to him. This helps with getting jobs. :)

Quentin, Gabby & Micah have been working hard crocheting to fill orders for 3 Musketeer Crochet.

JaidenNoah is still going to Occupational & Speech Therapy twice a week. He is improving so I know it's helping. He is pretty much potty trained also.

KianAdley is such a character. He makes me laugh most every day with his antics! He is so smart and is talking alot already.

ZaraLayna is a great little helper and such a sweet beautiful girl! I really enjoy her! I have been teaching her to wash her face, brush her hair and to put on clean clothes every morning. She is finally getting the hang of it. :)
She still has her issues from the Hirschsprung's Disease but she doesn't let it stop her!

Micah & Zeke had their piano recital May 20th. They both did awesome! Zeke is starting to be able to play more complicated pieces and it just warms my mama heart. Micah makes his own songs at each recital. He has his own unique style and I love seeing what He'll come up with.

Isaac is such a cutie pie. Every time I look at him all I see is his daddy. He looks so much like him when he was his age. He is reading well now. Last night he volunteered to read Ephesian 6:1-3 at our Shabbat table. He did an awesome job! He is a deep thinker and I can see the wheels turning as he thinks and thinks.

Gabriellia is growing in her relationship with Yeshua. I am so amazed at the things she tells me and shares with us during devotions and prayer. Her heart is to please Father.

Quentin is either busy crocheting or reading. That boy always has a book in his hands. I love it! I have always loved to read so seeing my children enjoy it please me so greatly.

Morgan-Britney is still working on her next novel. I can't wait to read it! It sounds really good already! She is waiting on Father as to what her direction in life should be. Waiting is hard for her as it is for so many of us but she is waiting. And we work together through those hard days where the waiting seems as if it may never end. My sweet girl is my special friend. We share so much and I love her more than the moon! I am so thankful for our relationship. We have our trials but in the end we have a very special mother/daughter relationship. She's my girl!!

After a bit shy of 13 months of hoping and praying our prayers were answered and another little squirt is on it's way. We are praying for this new life. For health and a blessed pregnancy. I am honestly still so fearful but when I feel this way I tell myself that I have to walk in faith & trust. And I go right on to do what I was afraid to do or to think or to share.  I have to keep believing that as Jeremiah 29:11 says Father has good things in store for me. His promise to me Isaiah 43:19; he is doing a new thing...I hang onto this! And I keep walking...
 Pictures of our lives this last month:

    
                                            We bike ride as often as we can!

                                                  My two little men!

                                                     Heading out to dinner on my birthday!

                                                      Micah & Quentin: haircuts!

                                                    Micah & Zeke at their piano recital.

                                                    School work....

                                          working on cave drawings..

                                                            Science project: the planets.

                                                            My girl!

                                          3 Musketeer Crochet: a doll pillow handmade by Quentin.

                                                  LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love is life with my family!